daddy's girl.

i am definitely my father's child. we have the same sense of humor. the same thoughts. the same intonation. all my looks come from him/his side of the family. without a doubt we are related. when i was little my mom called me markita. because i'm just the little girl version of my daddy.


some of our pictures..

just chilling at the lagoon.

a few years later...

lots of years later.

high school graduation

last easter

we have more pictures. but they're not on this computer, and i don't want to try to find them.
thanks for the thousands of soccer practices and games, dance competitions and shows, and fashion advice daddy!

going away.

since i've been home from south africa/swaziland (which is a long time. about 10 months.) i've wanted to go back. and it isn't even because i had the time of my life there. i didn't. but i just felt like we were doing such great things for god's kingdom and we were so clearly focused on doing his work while we were there. it's something i miss.
god calls us to be his hands and feet, and help whoever we can when we can. and on that trip i really realized the magnitude of the people who need help and that we have the opportunity to serve if we take it.
but i've learned that it isn't just ours to take. it is ours to take in god's time. and that is something i've struggled with for months because i'm a problem fixer. i know there are people in swazi i could be helping if i were there. probably more significantly than the people i'm helping while i'm home. but that isn't what i am being called to do right now. and for a long time i couldn't figure out why. but the other day the college leader at church, chris, told me he was excited to see how god was going to grow me and my passion for him while i'm waiting to go away and do more of his work. and it made sense finally. 
god isn't punishing me by keeping me here. he is giving me the opportunity and time to develop my strengths and strengthen my weaknesses. and grow in my relationship with him while he creates me into the person he has made me to be. and when it is time for me to go away and love on his children, i will be able to do that. but for now, while i'm learning, i get to love on his children here. what a blessing that is!

and one day, i hope to be back here. to love on them and give them cookies again!

and help little ones like these get off the streets and know they were created by such an amazing god, with a specific, perfect plan for their life.

sunshine and summertime.

after being back in california for nearly a week, i can say that sunshine actually can be used in the same sentence as summertime. it's been beautiful here, and i am even more thankful for the weather after experiencing summer storms while i was in idaho.
they were kinda fun though. we spent [endless] hours on the couch catching up on say yes to the dress and eating everything-free foods.


here are some pictures to hopefully make up a quick review of the past few weeks..

our view from the living room window. we got really used to this scene. it was hailing during this but the flash made that impossible to see.

part of the ridiculous hike brittan took us on. that had no path. really.

my favorite animal at the boise zoo. i forget what it's called but it looked like a little rabbit dog. it was so funny!

our view while we were wandering slightly lost in the oregon countryside. love adventures with elise!

and before we left for the idaho adventure..

senior banquet at ipc with my favorite senior girl. love my maddy! and that we look almost like sisters finally!

i love these girls to the moon!

the real sunshine and summertime!

sparkly trees.

i'm in idaho on vacation right now. i love vacationing in idaho because it is seriously the opposite of california. 
for instance..
there is a lot of space. it's crazy. you can't just touch your neighbor's house from your house.
everything is green. in california (at least where i am) there is some green, but it's mostly different shades of tan. houses are tan, sidewalks are light tan, other shopping complexes are darker tan. i love the planned, organization of it all. but it is so nice to see tan be not such a priority.
you get to say things like "i'm driving into town" and actually have to drive to get places.
there are horses in front yards. or pastures? whatever they are, there are horses in them. 
and one of my favorite things about idaho is that there are trees that aren't palm trees. actually, i don't think there even are palm trees here. but there are these other ones. i'm not sure what they're called. brittan probably knows. but when the wind blows, the leaves look like they're sparkling. it's so cool. i just sit and watch them, and since it's been super windy, it's worked well.


i'll post pictures of our adventure driving from irvine to caldwell later. and my sparkly trees. hopefully they sparkle through pictures.

some summer days.

i've been waiting for this post for days. the one that gets to say that it's summer time! and i'm at home, my friends are slowly (veryyy slowly) making their way home, and i have nothing to do with my life but lie by the pool, go on leisurely walks and eat endless amounts of golden spoon.

which is all true. so, so true. i mean, my brunch this morning (at noon) was golden spoon.


however.. (ha. i always have a however, don't i?) it just hasn't felt like summer yet, and so i haven't made my summer post even though it's been over a week. 
maybe it's because i'm not unpacked from school yet. i still have tubs of blankets, bags of sweaters, and boxes of shoes that have hardly been touched. 
maybe it's because every time i come home from school for an extended period of time, it feels more and more difficult to get back into the groove of irvine life. i'm so used to just taking care of myself and being responsible for myself that it's a little strange to have dinner dates i can count on every night (with my family, of course).
maybe it's because elise is visiting and so there is still a little apu with me.
maybe it's because the thought of not having homework or papers for four months seems completely unfathomable. 
maybe it's because my "home friends" are taking their sweet time coming home. or they're on choir tour, which makes them equally inaccessible. and home without them is just a little bit less like home.
or maybe it's just because the weather is being ridiculous. 


whatever the reason is, i'm praying it will go away soon because i'm ready for summer! 

my God is so big.

you know that song you sing in sunday school about how big God is?


"my God is so great,
so strong and so mighty
there's nothing my God cannot do.
the mountains are His, 
the rivers are His,
the stars are His handiwork too.
my God is so great,
so strong and so mighty
there's nothing my God cannot do."


it is so, so true. i actually think all the really important lessons we learn about God we learn through songs in sunday school. 
but this one in particular has been stuck in my head all night. i'm not sure why. i think it's because recently i've been thinking about how to love on others (like my friends in swazi and joburg) and have been praying for them and about them being loved on.
and God keeps trying to reassure me that He has it under control. He's the big one. i just think i am. 

finals.

finals week is finally here. it's probably the only week i dread and look forward to at the same time. it is by far the most draining week of the semester and the stress of packing up an apartment only adds to it. but the end is so close, i can't help but be happy. knowing that summer is only 2 days away just has to make you happy.
here are my thoughts on finals week:
-i've never seen a library look like this. there are people everywhere, all studying or writing. not talking to each other. but everyone looks beyond drained.
-the weather is warm. hot actually. so the pool is full. but nearly everyone is studying while they're sitting outside. 
-people are up early (if they even sleep) to keep working.
-the only way you can make it through finals week is by giving yourself sanity breaks. to blog. shop online. skype a friend in paris. get frozen yogurt for lunch and dinner in the same day. whatever it takes.


its just one of those weeks i have take day by day. or question by question. because thinking about the next final, or how everything is going to fit into our storage unit will overwhelm me so much that i won't be able to finish what is actually in front of me.